Dan and I had been discussing adoption for a few years now (basically, since Adalee was born 4 yrs ago) With all the craziness of Papa's illness/death, the holidays and trying to figure out Adalee's neurological issues, it was too difficult to find the time to write about that subject.
Last summer we started to seriously research and discuss our options. I always felt a tug on my heart, leading to the foster/adoption route, but Dan had decided that he would be more comfortable with a domestic infant adoption...so we started down that road. The more and more we discussed and discovered information on this avenue of adoption, the more tension and disagreements we faced. It got to the point where we just called it quits on the whole thing. We decided to pray individually and not bring it up, until we felt certain of something. I was certain where I stood, but I would never push Dan into something he wasn't sure about. So, I just waited.
It was so heart breaking, seeing as this has been something I have wanted my whole life, and especially in the last 4 yrs, knowing this was our only option of growing our family. I went to a church women's retreat in October, hoping to just take my mind off things and have a great time. About 10 minutes after being there I unloaded all my emotions onto the women I was rooming with. Ha! It just spewed out. I had no control. But they were very kind, and it felt good to get it off my chest.
Literally, less than 2 weeks after that retreat Dan came to me and said "Now, I don't want you to freak out or anything but....I just wanted you to know that I've really been feeling God leading us towards the foster/adoption route. I'm not absolutely sure, but I think that's what he's telling me"
As time passed, Dan felt more certain of that idea. Discussing the infant adoption brought so much tension and anxiety, but with every discussion we had about adopting through the state we both felt such certainty and peace.
We attended the informational meeting and then tried to sign up for the 30 hour required training, but the Dec/Jan. classes were full.
So we signed up for the Feb/Mar classes. I wanted so badly to tell people our decision, but I was worried about one thing; my health. Although I am capable of raising my daughter and caring for my household, my doctors do not want me working full-time. I feared that my health issues would affect our application being accepted. I mean, if my doctors do not feel that I'm capable enough to work, why should someone else find me capable enough to handle the demands of multiple children? That fear haunted me.
I decided not to officially announce anything until I was assured that my health would not be an issue.
Today the case worker called me and said that she received the health forms that my cardiologist filled out and also the forms that I had filled out. She shared them with her supervisor. Neither she nor the supervisor, found anything in them that would cause our application to not be accepted, and we are welcome to start the training. Such great news! And on my Papa's birthday, too :)
So, the news is that we are officially starting the adoption process. Our first class is this Saturday.
We will complete our 30 hour training on March 8th
Then begin the massive amounts of paper work.
After the paper work is completed we will start the home study.
After the home study we wait for a match.
It's going to be a long process, but we are ecstatic to finally begin, and see what God has in store for us.
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